


Toil Until the Old Colours Fade | Did-It-Happen-or-Not AU snippet collection

by drcalvin



Series: Groundhog-verse [3]
Category: Les Misérables (2012), Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Dubois (Original Male Character) - Freeform, Gen, Not Quite Canonical For Universe, Outtake, Sauveterre (Original Male Character), Sillyness, Three Sentence Ficlet, crackfluff, giftfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-08
Updated: 2013-07-08
Packaged: 2017-12-18 03:59:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/875367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drcalvin/pseuds/drcalvin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Little ficlets that are somehow connected to Toil Until The Old Colours Fade. Not strictly canon, and so far all are to blame on Voksen.</p><p>1) Dubois has a crush on Javert.<br/>2) Dubois convinces everyone that Javert is psychic.<br/>3) Sauveterre and the upstairs bureaucracy</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The one where Dubois has a crush on Javert

**Author's Note:**

  * For [voksen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/voksen/gifts).
  * Translation into 中文 available: [待旧色老去| 亦虚亦实片段灭文法](https://archiveofourown.org/works/887844) by [micorom](https://archiveofourown.org/users/micorom/pseuds/micorom)



“…and that’s when the Inspector turned around! Before they had made any sound at all. And he struck with his cane – _swoosh_ , like so, oh, sorry Luc! – anyway, he broke the nearest bastard's nose without even taking aim. Well, you can just imagine that the entire gang nearly pissed themselves at that, but, I swear on my old grandmother’s grave, that the Inspector does that sort of thing all the time. No, not the nosebreaking, he almost never has to go that far. But he’s just – he’s amazing,” Dubois’ said, his voice faltering and he hurried to looked down, awkardly studying his worn cuffs.

“I didn’t like him that much at first; kept thinking he was a a stuck-up son of a… Ahem, well, never mind that. But as time went on, I realized that he is – He’s the most honest man I know, the Inspector. No, more than honest, he's through-and-through dedicated to the idea of justice; I’ve met other men of renown – our old mayor was a living saint, the finest soul who’ve walked this earth! – but none have ever impressed me like the Inspector. And none of them, no-one, would have bothered to try and instruct a clumsy fool like me. Hah, fine, laugh all you want, but if he hadn’t showed me right, I’d have either been dead from dicing and drinking or stuck a poor country Inspector with half a sou to my name and nothing but years of tedious duty before me – what? Yes, of course I’m still not rich, but now I can – Shut it and listen! Now, I take pride in my work. I see it as a duty and a calling, and even if I know I’ll never be as glorious as the Inspector, I know I make a difference. He’s shown me, that, that there’s more to being a policeman than just patrolling the night and nicking the bastards we stumble over; there’s a beauty in upholding the law and that’s, yes, I think that’s what shines through from the Inspector, that’s what makes him what he is, because he is filled with the light of law… And, and he’s standing right behind me, isn’t he ( _oh sweet Jesus_ ), why, good day to you Inspector!”


	2. The time Dubois convinced everyone that Javert was psychic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The time Dubois convinced everyone that Javert was psychic - originally a 3-sentence ficlet for Voksen.

That Inspector Javert liked to handle all details of a case himself was known to all, as per his wishes; that he often wished to be informed of seemingly irrelevant matters as well. As such, he first found it neither remarkable nor irritating when the men around the station came to him with all manners of dice and card decks, asking for his opinion on their quality, and begged him to inspect them for potential tampering — Javert had after all begun his career in Paris by closing a large gambling ring. 

When, however, a full month had passed and the questions did not let off (indeed, men from other offices began to come to him with their confiscated dice!), his suspicions grew darker; especially as he could not recall the matter going on for so long in any previous life. A carefully put question to the man at the neighboring desk revealed nothing untoward. And Dubois — always the most likely suspect in matters stemming more from sloppy talk than outright malice — professed ignorance to having spread any false rumors regarding Javert’s taste for the dice. So his investigation remained frustrated, until one day, when he exited the public jailed and was suddenly hailed by a pair of cutthroats and gamblers with the following words: “Oi, Inspector! Ain’t fair you only bless the goods of the bleedin’ coppers! A man’s gotta make a livin’ too, don’t he?"

* * *

The sentence redacted from this report contains foul language unsuited for innocent minds and those of faint hearts; luckily, Dubois possessed neither.


	3. The one where Inspector Sauveterre doesn't (quite) facepalm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sauveterre vs. bureaucracy. Tiny spoilers for the last chapter of Toil & a huge mass of crack.

"I am the patron of soldiers," Maurice points out to the mirror. “Soldiers. I’m fairly certain that policemen have their own patron." He pointedly does not look at the shining, angelic presence on the right side of the table; the presence just as pointedly fails to hear him.

"You are the patron saint of Frenchmen too," Maria Madeleine says and when she smiles at him, he feels his own lips twitch. She is hard to resist, that one.

"Certain specific Frenchmen. Not this one."

"I think... these matters, they need the human touch," Michael says and languidly plays with one of his shining pinions. He doesn’t meet Maurice’s eyes and allows not a hint of guilt to colour his voice. The sheer cheek is almost impressive. “Takes a certain, what do you call it, personal experience to really get to the heart of the problem… besides, I have no complaints about his work as a policeman."

Maria Madeleine gives a delicate little cough, and Michael waves an excusing wing in her direction.

(When Hildegard has to wipe down out of her eyes a moment later, Maurice has to admit that he doesn’t miss that part of being at the bi-centennial meetings in person – but the coffee break snacks? Those are to die for. Especially compared to what they serve in the Paris police force in this time.)

"Of course, my dear," Michael tuts, trying to smooth things over. "I have not forgotten that he was too quick to judge – that is after all why Mauritius is down there. I simply meant in a more general sense."

"Pardon, were you talking to me?" Uriel looks up from his long-going game of scrabble. Everyone shakes their heads, quickly; it’s never good to get him too involved in the minor details of repenting sinners.

"I don’t mind a bit of out-of-jurisdiction work. I just want it brought to the record," Maurice points out, while suspecting it’s useless, “that soldiers are my detail, not policemen."

Someone raps on his office door, loudly and insistently. “Inspector! Inspector, Madame Bouvair is back – this time it was the neighbour’s dog that committed acts of gross indecency within her sight! The Secretary says it’s your turn to deal with her." 

He gives Michael a weary look through the shimmering surface of the mirror. “Soldiers," he repeats. “Nice, disciplined soldiers who can be sent to dig trenches if they start to imagine things about their neighbour’s dog."

"We’ll see if we can’t send some inspiration his way," Michael promises, “or perhaps to one of the others."

With saintly patience, he resists to tell Michael exactly what to do with his inspiration, and puts his hat back on. Duty calls.

"Please hurry, inspector, because she didn't just bring her own dog, she took the neighbour’s too! And the owner followed her and they can only stall him for so long down in the lobby…"

Non-violence, Sauveterre reminds himself; patience, forgiveness and non-violence.


End file.
